It’s the start of a new school year. For most children, few things changed from one school year to the next. For others, things drastically changed as a result of their parents divorcing. In some situations, they are leaving family members, friends, neighbors, and the community they’ve always known. The emotions typically experienced are sadness from loss, fear of the unknown, and feeling that they won’t fit in.
The sooner children merge into the local environment, the sooner they will start to feel secure. Some children readily adapt to a new community while others need more time for adjustment. If a child is involved in music, sports, church, or other school/community activities, it is helpful for them to find a local connection. The social benefit generally outweighs the initial awkwardness the child may feel. Don’t be afraid to share your similar feelings.
One of the primary concerns for parents is learning to achieve balance in the new setting. Daycare, after school care, extracurricular activities, and financial stability are weighed against the parent’s work schedule and income. After divorce, many parents find themselves struggling to pay for all the things necessary to build a new life independently. In these situations, parents may not be able to immediately focus on costly activities.
Many parents enjoy spending time together in local parks, churches, and libraries. Walking around the neighborhood meeting other families and attending community activities can be helpful, too. If possible, take your child on a guided tour of the new school before it begins to ease their stress. Depending on your community, there may be a recreation center nearby that could give your child the opportunity to engage with other children their age.
Children tend to be resilient. With a little time and care, your efforts will pay off. You’ll be glad you did your best for your child.
